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Answers

Why am I experiencing a loss of patience?

\"\"Written byAllan Schwartz, Ph.D.\"\"Medically reviewed byJesse Hanson, Ph.D.
Published
Updated
Reviewed

Summary

\"An

A reader is easily irritated and quickly loses patience, damaging relationships with family and a boyfriend. They ask whether medication could help and what might explain the change.

The response suggests a psychiatric assessment and discusses depression as one possible source of irritability and anger, without confirming it from the message.

It also recommends psychotherapy, particularly cognitive behavioral work on thoughts linked to symptoms, and notes that alcohol or drug use can worsen depressive difficulties.

?

Question

Reader · Identity withheld

I seem to lose my patience very quickly with everything !!! its really effecting my family and boyfriend. i am so quick to get a bad temper and i get in a mood over things that aren’t with getting mad about .

\n

I'm just very easily agitated and my patience is out the window. what is wrong with me ?? sometimes i feel like i need to be on meds to keep me sane and to always be a nice person i just feel i’m always mean , testy and ready to fly off the handle. please help ! its ruining my life !

\"\"

Answer

Allan Schwartz, Ph.D.

I agree that you need a consultation with a Psychiatrist in order to be evaluated for medication. The type of loss of temper you are describing could be a result of depression.

\n

Among the symptoms of depression are: agitation, sadness, anger and loss of temper, either sleeping too much or difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep, either loss of appetite or eating too much and weight gain, loss of libido or sexual desire and low self esteem.

There can also be thoughts of not wanting to live and even of wishing to commit suicide. A person does not need to experience all of these symptoms to be diagnosed with depression.

\n

There are factors that can worsen depressive symptoms such as drinking alcohol or using drugs such as marijuana. People tend to mistakenly believe that drugs and alcohol make them feel better but the reverse is usually the result.

\n

There are different types of depression that can be affecting you and among these are Dysthymia, Major Depression or Bipolar Disorder. Depression is often accompanied by anxiety and worry.

\n

Along with medication it is recommended that you enter psychotherapy in order that you learn how to identify and control those thoughts that cause you to experience many of the symptoms described above. The type of therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Subject matter expert

\"\"

Bob Livingstone, LCSW

Bereavement, emotional pain, and loss

View profile
\"\"
Author

Allan Schwartz, Ph.D.

Allan Schwartz, LCSW, Ph.D., is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with over 30 years of private practice experience.

\"\"
Medical reviewer

Jesse Hanson, Ph.D.

Jesse Hanson, Ph.D., is a clinical and somatic psychologist with over 20 years of experience in neuropsychology, specializing in integrative, mind-body…

\"\"

Related community

Emotional Health

Explore feelings, self-awareness, and the emotional experiences that shape everyday life.

Related questions

How can I cope with the unbearable loss of my husband?Will my boyfriend eventually hit me?Will I ever feel normal?
","text":"Home Answers Why am I experiencing a loss of patience? AnswersWhy am I experiencing a loss of patience? Written byAllan Schwartz, Ph.D.Medically reviewed byJesse Hanson, Ph.D. Published June 1, 2024 Updated June 5, 2026 Reviewed September 15, 2025 SummaryQuestionAnswer Summary A reader is easily irritated and quickly loses patience, damaging relationships with family and a boyfriend. They ask whether medication could help and what might explain the change. The response suggests a psychiatric assessment and discusses depression as one possible source of irritability and anger, without confirming it from the message. It also recommends psychotherapy, particularly cognitive behavioral work on thoughts linked to symptoms, and notes that alcohol or drug use can worsen depressive difficulties. ? Question Reader · Identity withheld I seem to lose my patience very quickly with everything !!! its really effecting my family and boyfriend. i am so quick to get a bad temper and i get in a mood over things that aren’t with getting mad about . I'm just very easily agitated and my patience is out the window. what is wrong with me ?? sometimes i feel like i need to be on meds to keep me sane and to always be a nice person i just feel i’m always mean , testy and ready to fly off the handle. please help ! its ruining my life ! Answer Allan Schwartz, Ph.D. I agree that you need a consultation with a Psychiatrist in order to be evaluated for medication. The type of loss of temper you are describing could be a result of depression. Among the symptoms of depression are: agitation, sadness, anger and loss of temper, either sleeping too much or difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep, either loss of appetite or eating too much and weight gain, loss of libido or sexual desire and low self esteem. There can also be thoughts of not wanting to live and even of wishing to commit suicide. A person does not need to experience all of these symptoms to be diagnosed with depression. There are factors that can worsen depressive symptoms such as drinking alcohol or using drugs such as marijuana. People tend to mistakenly believe that drugs and alcohol make them feel better but the reverse is usually the result. There are different types of depression that can be affecting you and among these are Dysthymia, Major Depression or Bipolar Disorder. Depression is often accompanied by anxiety and worry. Along with medication it is recommended that you enter psychotherapy in order that you learn how to identify and control those thoughts that cause you to experience many of the symptoms described above. The type of therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Subject matter expert Bob Livingstone, LCSW Bereavement, emotional pain, and loss View profile AuthorAllan Schwartz, Ph.D. Allan Schwartz, LCSW, Ph.D., is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with over 30 years of private practice experience. Medical reviewerJesse Hanson, Ph.D. Jesse Hanson, Ph.D., is a clinical and somatic psychologist with over 20 years of experience in neuropsychology, specializing in integrative, mind-body… Related community Emotional Health Explore feelings, self-awareness, and the emotional experiences that shape everyday life. 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I seem to lose my patience very quickly with everything !!! its really effecting my family and boyfriend. i am so quick to get a bad temper and i get in a mood over things that aren’t with getting mad about .

\n

I'm just very easily agitated and my patience is out the window. what is wrong with me ?? sometimes i feel like i need to be on meds to keep me sane and to always be a nice person i just feel i’m always mean , testy and ready to fly off the handle. please help ! its ruining my life !

","text":"I seem to lose my patience very quickly with everything !!! its really effecting my family and boyfriend. i am so quick to get a bad temper and i get in a mood over things that aren’t with getting mad about . I'm just very easily agitated and my patience is out the window. what is wrong with me ?? sometimes i feel like i need to be on meds to keep me sane and to always be a nice person i just feel i’m always mean , testy and ready to fly off the handle. please help ! its ruining my life !"},"answer":{"id":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/answers/loss-of-patience#answer","url":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/answers/loss-of-patience#answer","html":"

I agree that you need a consultation with a Psychiatrist in order to be evaluated for medication. The type of loss of temper you are describing could be a result of depression.

\n

Among the symptoms of depression are: agitation, sadness, anger and loss of temper, either sleeping too much or difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep, either loss of appetite or eating too much and weight gain, loss of libido or sexual desire and low self esteem.

There can also be thoughts of not wanting to live and even of wishing to commit suicide. A person does not need to experience all of these symptoms to be diagnosed with depression.

\n

There are factors that can worsen depressive symptoms such as drinking alcohol or using drugs such as marijuana. People tend to mistakenly believe that drugs and alcohol make them feel better but the reverse is usually the result.

\n

There are different types of depression that can be affecting you and among these are Dysthymia, Major Depression or Bipolar Disorder. Depression is often accompanied by anxiety and worry.

\n

Along with medication it is recommended that you enter psychotherapy in order that you learn how to identify and control those thoughts that cause you to experience many of the symptoms described above. The type of therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

","text":"I agree that you need a consultation with a Psychiatrist in order to be evaluated for medication. The type of loss of temper you are describing could be a result of depression. Among the symptoms of depression are: agitation, sadness, anger and loss of temper, either sleeping too much or difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep, either loss of appetite or eating too much and weight gain, loss of libido or sexual desire and low self esteem. There can also be thoughts of not wanting to live and even of wishing to commit suicide. A person does not need to experience all of these symptoms to be diagnosed with depression. There are factors that can worsen depressive symptoms such as drinking alcohol or using drugs such as marijuana. People tend to mistakenly believe that drugs and alcohol make them feel better but the reverse is usually the result. There are different types of depression that can be affecting you and among these are Dysthymia, Major Depression or Bipolar Disorder. Depression is often accompanied by anxiety and worry. Along with medication it is recommended that you enter psychotherapy in order that you learn how to identify and control those thoughts that cause you to experience many of the symptoms described above. The type of therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.","author":{"@type":"Person","@id":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/people/allan-schwartz#person","name":"Allan Schwartz, Ph.D.","url":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/people/allan-schwartz"}},"summaryScope":"Editorial overview of the original question and response; original review dates apply to the source conversation."},"presentation":{"updatedAt":"2026-10-03","template":"answer-conversation","imageGeneratedAt":"2026-10-03"},"seo":{"title":"Why am I experiencing a loss of patience?","description":"A reader is easily irritated and quickly loses patience, damaging relationships with family and a boyfriend.","canonical":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/answers/loss-of-patience","robots":"index,follow","socialImage":{"url":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/assets/optimized/f7d19272dd5d30590dddbab9.png","width":1200,"height":630,"alt":"MentalHealth.com — Answers","type":"image/png","sitemapGroup":"answers"}},"subjectMatterExpert":{"name":"Bob Livingstone","url":"/people/bob-livingstone","profileId":"6408","topic":"grief","focus":"Bereavement, emotional pain, and loss","selectionBasis":"Documented expertise in the existing published profile","reviewAttribution":false},"navigation":[{"label":"Summary","href":"#summary"},{"label":"Question","href":"#question"},{"label":"Answer","href":"#answer"}],"relatedCommunity":{"community":"/community/emotional-health","basis":"topic match"},"collections":[]}