What should I do about my wife and her sister?
Jesse Hanson, Ph.D.
– Written by
Ann Landers
– Updated on September 7, 2025
Question
I have been married to my wife for 4 years. Twice I have come home and found her making love to her sister. They act like it’s no big deal and they want me to film them. I don’t know how to handle it, and they won’t stop.
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Answer
If your wife’s actions bother you, let her know! Have you discussed this situation with her? Let her know how you feel. In a sense, she is being unfaithful to you, although she may not see it that way. What would you do if you came home and found her with another man? You would probably make your feelings more evident…right? Ask her why she is doing it.
Often times spouses cheat either because their needs aren’t being met or because they have fallen in love with someone else. I’m guessing your wife isn’t in love with her sister. Is there any reason your wife may be feeling ignored?
Another possibility is that she is experimenting with her sexuality and feels safer doing so with her sister. No matter what the reason is, you are expressing unhappiness about the situation. I suggest that the two of you seek couples counseling. It is my guess that her actions have underlying causes…
Hope things work out, – Anne
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Jesse Hanson, Ph.D., is a somatic psychologist with more than 20 years of experience in clinical psychology and neuropsychology.
Ann Landers was a writer who specialized in offering advice from the perspective of a mentor or friend. She wrote blogs focused on friendship, romantic relationships, heartbreak, and beyond.
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Jesse Hanson, Ph.D.
– Written by
Ann Landers
– Updated on September 7, 2025
Additional Reading
The Clinical Affairs Team at MentalHealth.com is a dedicated group of medical professionals with diverse and extensive clinical experience. They actively contribute to the development of content, products, and services, and meticulously review all medical material before publication to ensure accuracy and alignment with current research and conversations in mental health. For more information, please visit the Editorial Policy.
We are a health technology company that guides people toward self-understanding and connection. The platform provides reliable resources, accessible services, and nurturing communities. Its purpose is to educate, support, and empower people in their pursuit of well-being.