The term narcissist often refers to someone who is arrogant, manipulative, and grandiose. Narcissists can display a variety of traits, which may differ from person to person and vary depending on the gender, age, and background of the individual. It can be helpful to know the different ways that narcissism can present, to help recognize and manage harmful traits and behaviors.
Key takeaways
- Narcissistic traits can include grandiosity, entitlement, admiration seeking, and exploitative behavior, but presentation varies between individuals.
- Harmful behaviors can affect relationships, making boundaries and support important for those affected.
- Professional treatment can address narcissistic personality disorder and co-occurring difficulties such as depression or substance use.
What is a male narcissist?
A male narcissist refers to a male who exhibits narcissistic behavior or has been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). Male narcissists may display different behaviors to a female narcissist, although some traits will inevitably overlap.
A narcissist is someone who displays some or all of the traits of narcissistic personality disorder. NPD is one of ten personality disorders listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5)[1].
To be diagnosed with NPD, individuals must meet several of the following criteria[1][2]:
- Inflated or fluctuating self-esteem
- Often very arrogant and entitled
- Manipulating or deceiving others for personal gain
- Displaying aggressive behaviors
- Sensitivity to criticism and shame
- Constant need for validation and attention from others
- Strong desire for power and success
NPD is more likely to affect men than women, although recent research suggests that it is likely to present differently depending on gender. Additionally, studies indicate that there are two prominent types of NPD, known as overt and covert narcissism[3][4].
Overt or grandiose narcissists have very high self-esteem, display aggressive behaviors, and are externally expressive. In contrast, covert or vulnerable narcissists have very low self-esteem, are more sensitive to criticism, are more withdrawn, and are more internally expressive[2][4].
Subject matter expert
Personality disorders, anxiety, and depression
View profileIs narcissism different in men than in women?
Mayo Clinic notes that NPD is more common in males, while emphasizing that symptoms and severity vary. This does not mean that gender alone can identify the condition[3][5][6].
Symptoms vary among individuals and are not reliably identified through gender stereotypes. Possible responses include:[3][5][7][8]
- Anger or feeling easily slighted
- Insecurity, shame, or fear of failure
- Withdrawal from situations that threaten self-esteem
Some of these differences can be attributed to gender stereotypes and expectations, which are demonstrated and modeled from a young age. As such, if a child is at risk of developing NPD, the parental and societal expectations they experience due to their gender are likely to influence the symptoms and traits that develop[6][8].
Individual assessment matters more than assumptions about how men or women ought to behave[6][5].
It is important to note that these gender differences may not apply to all individuals with NPD, as presentations of these traits can vary depending on several factors aside from gender.
Generally, females are more likely to have covert NPD, while males are more likely to have overt NPD. However, males can also experience covert NPD. Additionally, research suggests that there are fewer gender differences in this type of narcissism[3].
Male narcissist traits
NPD can involve persistent patterns such as:[1][2][4][5]
- Exaggerated self-importance
- Excessive need for admiration
- Expectations of special treatment
- Taking advantage of others
- Difficulty recognizing others’ feelings
How to deal with male narcissists
Dealing with a narcissist can be challenging and draining, so it can be helpful to know how to manage these interactions. It may be helpful to utilize the following:
- Learn more: Learning more about traits of NPD and narcissism can help with recognizing manipulative tactics and abusive behaviors. This can provide the necessary knowledge to avoid or cope with challenging situations and interactions with narcissists.
- Set boundaries: Make clear and blunt statements about behaviors and language that you will not tolerate or accept. This can help to protect you from difficult situations and can provide clear boundaries to the narcissist, so they know what to expect in their interactions with you.
- Don’t compliment or criticize: Narcissists thrive off compliments and are sensitive to criticisms. As such, avoid saying things that could be interpreted in either way and attempt to maintain neutral and noncommittal language. This way, you are likely to avoid being used for their gratification and validation and are less likely to encounter aggressive or hostile responses.
- Keep interactions short: The longer you interact with a narcissist, the more likely it is that they will attempt to pull you into one of their exploitation or manipulation tactics. Avoid long conversations, only communicate necessary information, and don’t tell them any personal details.
- Avoid them completely: If you can, the best way to manage a narcissist is to avoid them completely. It may not always be possible if they are a family member or work colleague. However, if you are encountering emotional or physical harm from a narcissist, it is advisable to end all interactions with them if possible.
- Seek professional help: Following a relationship or repeated interaction with a narcissist, it is common to experience negative impacts. Seeking professional treatment and advice can help manage these effects, by processing and overcoming the harm that has been caused.
Treatment for narcissists
Many people with narcissistic traits do not choose to seek professional diagnosis or treatment. Often this is because they do not experience any impairments or feel that they need professional help. However, some people with NPD experience symptoms of other conditions for which they require support, such as depression, suicidal ideation, and substance abuse[4].
Treatment is available to help people manage symptoms of NPD and comorbid conditions, and may include psychotherapy and medication. Receiving professional advice and treatment is the most effective way to manage and reduce mental health symptoms[2][4].
