How can my best friend heal from harassment?
Question
One of my friends was sexually harassed in school and now it is all she can think about. She is petrified that a man is going to rape her and all day and night it is all she can think about. She says she has horrible images in her head of getting kidnapped and then raped and she wonders if she is going crazy. She knows that this isn’t normal behavior. What should she do to get these images out of her mind? Is there anything I can do to help her?
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Answer
Your friend may be dealing with something in the post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) spectrum, although only a qualified mental health doctor can say for sure. I’d recommend she get herself evaluated by a competent mental health doctor to learn whether this or some other treatable condition may be associated with her suffering.
PTSD and related conditions occur when someone is exposed to a traumatic experience (death or death-like, or self-concept shattering) and cannot come to terms with that experience in the due course of living thereafter. Severe anxiety and sometimes dissociation symptoms can occur. Treatment (medicines and psychotherapy) are available and can be helpful, but there is no ‘cure’ for memory.
The way out is ultimately through, meaning that while symptoms can be suppressed with medication and supportive interventions, to truly break free of the trauma, it is more or less necessary to gradually come to terms with it, to rebuild your shattered sense of security in the world, and to learn to live your life in spite of the fact that life is a risky business. Self-confidence building activities such as martial arts, or activities that help people reconnect with their physical bodies in a calming way (e.g., yoga) can sometimes be helpful too.